


Bowsette's Reward

by TheRealEvanSG



Category: Super Mario Bros. (Video Games)
Genre: Anal, Bisexual, Bowser decides Mario needs a reward, Bowser is sympathetic for Mario, Consensual, F/F, F/M, First Time, Gender Bender, Hormones, I am going to hell, Mental Transformation, OT3, Oral, Penetration, Polyamory, Sex, Titjob, Why Did I Write This?, gay or straight?, it's definitely the hormones, super crown
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-27
Packaged: 2019-07-16 08:48:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16082633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRealEvanSG/pseuds/TheRealEvanSG
Summary: For years, all Mario has gotten as a reward for risking life and limb to save his country and his three princesses are kisses on the cheeks, cakes, and a little fame. Bowser decides enough is enough, especially since a certain new item is out in the question mark blocks. And finally, the author might need mental help.





	1. Bowser Gets an Idea; This is Not a Good Thing

“Look at her.”

Bowser growled a furious, rumbling growl as from afar, he watched the blonde bitch pretend to smile as she kissed Mario’s forehead and then walked off into the castle with a sweep of her long, pink dress, utterly pristine despite her recent captivity. Mario blushed at the contact of her lips on his forehead; but when their backs were turned to each other, the red capped plumber’s face fell with obvious disappointment. And Bowser knew exactly why.

Years. For years, Mario had risked life and limb saving her sorry ass from all sorts of threats after they inevitably captured her. Sometimes he even literally died, only surviving thanks to the 1-Up Shrooms he’d rarely find on his journeys. The mustachioed human, round-faced and equally round-bellied, would throw his entire career and relaxed life away to travel across the country, the planet, even entire worlds in order to rescue her from whatever fate fell upon her.

And what did he get in return?

A kiss on the forehead.

A cake.

Some local fame.

How was that fair?

Perhaps Bowser shouldn’t be considering what was and wasn’t fair. After all, he’d kidnapped the princess himself several times. He was by no means a fair arbiter of morality or a good Koopa to talk to regarding life choices. But after he had actually captured her the first time as a protest to point out the vastly insignificant security detail of the Mushroom Kingdom’s castle―he’d been young and dumb, fight him―and found out what a bitch she was? No, way. He’d wanted to be done with her then and there. He was actually glad when the mushroom-loving human came knocking for her. In fact, contrary to the stories Peach later spread about Mario having to drop him into a pit of lava, he readily handed her back.

At the current time, the red-maned Koopa King gestured frustratedly towards the scene on the other side of the bushes he crouched behind. “Look at how the poor guy’s just slinking home, head hanging like he’s got a fuckin’ Thwomp on his head,” Bowser said, chewing his lip as he glared at the Goomba sitting beside him. “It’s not right! He and his brother just saved the Kingdom from an alien invasion, again, and he gets a kiss on the forehead? He still doesn’t even have a medal of honor for his efforts!”

The Goomba looked up at him in a deadpan. “Well, boss, you’re the one complaining about it. What do you wanna do, reward him?” This last part was said sarcastically. Goombas could be a sassy bunch. Bowser scoffed.

“Me? Reward that dude?” he snorted. “Mario beat my son’s face in with a hammer.”

“Well, you and him did kind of ruin the man’s vacation and frame him for a national crime he didn’t commit.”

The monstrous turtle’s tail flicked in annoyance. “Hey, it’s not my fault my nincompoop of a son was a bit too eager to try out E. Gadd’s invention! I panicked and went with the first plan that popped into my mind!”

His minion’s jaw slackened and he looked up at him with unbelieving eyes. “...Your son steals a magic paintbrush, and the first thing that pops into your mind isn’t to call the Toad Police, but to frame the one man who would never try to hurt anybody without legitimate reason as the perpetrator of a mass-pollution plot designed to eradicate an island’s main power source?”

“I was dealing with a lot of things at the time!” the king defended, folding his arms stubbornly. “My ex-wife cheated on me, I was trying to figure out how to create a flying vehicle using technology that had clearly never touched this stupid planet yet, and a whole bunch of the other Koopas came back from falling into the volcano as walking skeletons! I was really stressed!”

“Boss?” the Goomba said flatly.

Bowser glared at him. “Is it something important?”

“Yes.”

He sighed. “What?”

“You’re an idiot.” The Goomba, evidently pleased with himself, waddled off, probably to go find a wall of bricks. He liked to scare unsuspecting travellers by jumping out from behind one of the Kingdom’s many randomly placed obstacles.

Bowser glared at his retreating back. “Yeah, well… you’re an asshole, Jerry!”

“You aren’t denying that you’re an idiot!”

“Fuck you, Jerry!”

Now pouting and grumbling to himself, Bowser turned back to the direction of the castle courtyard. Honestly, frustrations with Jerry aside, his heart ached for his long-time nemesis. The horned monster and pot bellied plumber hadn’t always seen eye to eye, but they’d had some good times. Kart races, tennis matches, golf tournaments, baseball games… despite their differences, they’d formed a weird sort of friendship over the years.

And Bowser really did care about the plumber.

“Really, he should have so much more than he does,” Bowser mumbled to himself, watching the poor human’s slumping form as he retreated to the house he shared with… what was his name again? That green guy?

Bowser hummed as he considered the other women in Mario’s life, too. It wasn’t only Peach, after all… “Peach, Daisy… that space chick… he’s done so much for all of them. And he gets bare minimum in return? No way. He obviously cares deeply for all of them. He should get at the very least, a kiss on the lips! No, honestly, with all he’s risked? He should have been in bed with all three of those princesses.”

Bowser frowned.

“Yeah… honestly, why don’t they do more for him? It’s so unfair. I’m sick of it, really. How many times have we gone through this whole process? And basically, neither of us get anything out of it!”

The Koopa King was thinking.

A plan was forming in his mind.

For anyone who had been paying attention to the rest of the opening to this story, it should be clear that a plan forming in the Koopa King’s mind is not a good idea.

He’d heard rumors of one of the female-looking versions of those stupid little mushroom-capped fellows wearing crowns and turning into Peach lookalikes. Crowns they got from item blocks in the main fields of the Mushroom Kingdom. And not just Toadettes, either… he’d even heard rumors of some of his Goombas trying it out, some of his Koopas.

Mario deserved something better.

Mario deserved so much more.

And if Peach, Daisy, and Rosalina weren’t going to show Mario the good times he deserved as a result of all that? Well, then, he’d just have to show them how to do it by doing it himself, wouldn’t he? He’d just have to help Mario out, to reward him himself.

He wasn’t gay. It wasn’t gay if he’d be a girl at the time.

(It was totally gay.)

And thus at war with himself over whether it was or wasn’t gay to have sex with another man as a girl, our idiot ‘hero’ wandered off in search of an item block containing one of the new items he wanted.

Thus began a series of events that no parties involved were quite prepared for.


	2. Bowser Transforms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: gender bending, masturbation

Bowser, King of the Koopas, searched across hundreds of levels. He crossed grassy plains, deep seas, and dry, dry deserts. He passed by roaring dust devils, poisonous swamps, and floating lands in the clouds. He sojourned long and far after his quarry, punching block after block, and getting nothing but a sore, scaled fist in return for his troubles.

 

...In the space of three hours thanks to his flying Koopa Clown Car.

 

The thing was _fast_ , thanks to Kamek’s magic spells placed on it. He could travel across whole worlds in minutes! It made searching for the new area of the Mushroom Kingdom where the so-called Super Crown resided much, much easier. And finally, he could see the new World 1-1 coming up on the horizon! In seconds, he came upon it and slowed his clown car to a hover next to one of the many question mark blocks that lay hovering near the ground at jumping height.

 

Bowser swallowed as he looked at the question mark block that seemed to stare into his soul, begging him to punch it.

 

Was he really going to do this?

 

He looked to the left, then to the right.

 

It was a flat field he was parked in, with some vertical cliffs and mountains breaking it up. Several varieties of oak trees grew out of the ground, and all over the place, random lines and groupings of brown brick blocks and yellow question mark blocks floated unnaturally above the ground. Goombas and Koopas milled about, enjoying the warm sunshine as they walked around. Some birds flew overhead in the skies. Nobody was looking his way. No one he could see at least.

 

He swallowed and turned to the question mark block again.

 

“Last chance, Bowser,” he mumbled to himself, fiddling with his hands. A bead of cold sweat dripped down his yellow-tan cheek. “It’s either say goodbye to your manhood, or call it quits and find another way to make Mario feel better.”

 

Wait, what was he thinking? Bowser didn’t give up. That was how he had built his kingdom from the ground up. He’d never given up, even when his entire castle was taken over and transformed by aliens.

 

He wouldn’t give up now on something as small as this.

 

Taking a deep breath, the fire-breathing turtle man steered his Koopa Clown Car forward and firmly punched the question mark block. A crown with the cap of a purple spotted mushroom popped out the top.

 

This was happening. Oh, sweet mushrooms, this was happening. He was actually going to do do this. What lunacy had overcome him?

 

He grabbed the crown and placed it on his head.

 

The transformation started instantaneously. It felt like hot fire touching each part of him. His body shrunk, compacted, smoothened out. His scales fell away, revealing soft, creamy skin. His chest ballooned out, the feeling drawing out a strangely high-pitched moan from the King of the Koopas. None of this really concerned him. He had never really cared too much how or what he looked like. What _did_ concern him, though, was the feeling of his cock shrinking to non-existence, becoming a mere clitoris, and his entire insides rearranging to fit the new plumbing befitting his transformed body. That concern, however, was done away with as a new, searing heat made his whole body shiver in delight, and he fell back in his now seemingly much larger vehicle, right on his very round, curvy feminine ass.

 

“Hah… mmn… what is this…” Bowser gasped, new hormones he had never felt before flooding his brain. He felt _so good_! He’d never felt so good in his life! Actually… he didn’t really feel like a he anymore…

 

 _She_ rubbed her legs together uncomfortably; the heat that now flooded her system felt strongest down there. “Ah, fuck,” the new, more human queen groaned. The leg rubbing really did nothing to solve the new problem. Biting her lip, the new girl, who looked remarkably similar to Peach except with bigger tits and the same scarlet hair as Bowser, moaned and shot one small hand with long, dainty fingers down to her crotch.

 

It was the first time she had felt her new skin. With awe, she slid her hand slowly over its surface. It felt so _smooth_ , so slick… also somewhat more vulnerable than her scales had been. It was a strange sensation, feeling everything against her new skin; the warm sunlight and cool breeze, the rough sensation of her Clown Car… it was incredible.

 

Face flush, the human girl with a koopa shell on her back, two long and pointy horns sprouting out of her forehead, and a swishing, spiky tail gasped loudly. She couldn’t believe what was happening to her! Moaning, she hastily rubbed her brand new pussy, the fresh pink folds already slick with desire. She mewled with need, her tails swishing as intense sparks like she’d never before experienced wreaked delicious havoc on her new body. The sensation made her fingers stroke her own twat faster, faster, faster! She _needed_ more of that pleasure, needed it like a desperate hunger in her core.

 

“MMF, _fuck!_ ” she cried out, a burst of fire expelling from her mouth.

 

Her need grew stronger. It washed over her like an unrelenting wave. Cheeks redder than her hair, the Koopa girl plunged her fingers deep into her pussy on instinct, and immediately cried out in the loudest moan yet.

 

“Mmm, mm!” she groaned in pleasure, jilling herself off to no tomorrow. Her other hand feeling much too idle, it grabbed her left boob and her thumb flicked over her hard, pink nipple. Her eyes widened as more unheard of pleasure made her whole body tremble.

 

Her chest heaved. She tweaked it and fingered her pussy with abandon as she panted for breath, more turned on than she’d ever felt in her life. This female pleasure was _way too good_ ! And if it felt this good just from these small, slender fingers… what would it feel like if she had something _else_ in there? What would it feel like if something… _bigger_ and _harder_ would carve itself into her nether regions?

 

The thought finally pushed the former king, now queen over the edge.

 

“C-Cummiiiiiing!” she yelled, not caring how many Goombas and Koopas heard. Her entire back arched up and her body shook as her orgasm sprayed out of her pussy. Her hand fell away from her drenched pussy, and her other hand loosened its grip on her tit. Her brain felt fuzzy.

 

Exhaustion replaced the unbearable heat that had overwhelmed her. The redhead slumped to the floor of her Clown Car, gasping for breath, in awe of what had just happened. When she could at last string together a coherent thought, she considered herself.

 

First: maybe it was because of the new hormones flooding her body, but she just really didn’t feel like a ‘he’ anymore. Of course, she’d turn back into Bowser the moment she took her Super Crown off… but she really didn’t feel like doing that. She felt _comfortable_ in this body. Also, despite now being female, nothing about her personality had really changed that much. Not that she could sense off the bat, anyway.

 

And thirdly… she’d need a new name.

 

She thought she’d have trouble coming up with one but, honestly, it was a lot easier than she thought it would be; the moment she decided she’d need one, a name popped into mind - Bowsette. After all, when that Toadette girl turned into Peach, she’d called herself Peachette, so it made sense to call herself Bowsette, right? Bowsette didn’t really know, but she _did_ like the name. It stuck.

 

Her red eyes strayed down to her naked body.

 

Shit. She’d need some clothes. And she couldn’t very well just walk naked into Toad Town demanding clothes.

 

...She’d need to make a pit stop at home first.

 

~o~

 

Bowser Jr. had no idea what he thought that day was going to turn out to be like, but seeing a redhead Peach lookalike with horns, a Koopa shell, red eyes, and pointy teeth come flying home on his badass dad’s trusty Koopa Clown Car was _not_ what he was expecting.

 

His eyes bugged out.

 

His brain short-circuited.

 

His jaw dropped to the floor.

 

For several long moments, he was silent.

 

Then a single furious, confused shriek rang throughout Bowser’s (now Bowsette’s) Castle: **_“WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY DAD!?”_ **


	3. Reality Dawns, Peach Needs a Drink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bowsette has Kamek make her a dildo, the Koopalings have a group chat, and Peach feels the urge to crack open a cold one for the first time.

 

“So…” Kamek stared flatly while Bowser Jr. sat on the floor, trying to figure things out with dizzy eyes. “Let me get this straight. You decided Mario needed a better reward for everything he’s done.”

 

“Yup.” Bowsette nodded, her long, red curls bouncing with the motion.

 

The wizard rubbed his forehead weakly. “And to do so, you decided to put on the new Super Crown.”

 

“Mmhm.”

 

“And now you want to date him,” Kamek finished. He looked like he wanted to just end everything right then and there. “Your previous arch-nemesis. The man you always complained about day in and day out.”

 

Another nod. “That’s right.”

 

“...I don’t even know what to say about this,” the poor magic-wielding Koopa groaned. “What has this world gotten itself into, Your Nakedness?”

 

Bowsette shrugged and grinned. “I dunno, but I don’t think they’re quite prepared for how  _ smokin’ hot _ this bod is! Like, shit, I’m sexier than Peach herself now!” She squeezed a tit for emphasis, silently enjoying the small spark of pleasure it sent through her.

 

“NOPE!” Bowser Jr. cried, plugging his ears and hauling ass out of the throne room. “NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR THIS!”

 

The redhead watched him go with a blink. “Huh, I thought he’d like having a mom again,” she muttered, shaking her head in surprise. “Ah well. Kamek, I was thinking about something on the way back. First of all, I need clothes. Second of all… I kinda want to stay this way. I feel absolutely  _ rockin’ _ like this. Do you think you could make it so that the Super Crown’s power stays with me even if I’m hit or not wearing it?”

 

“...Sure,” Kamek sighed. “If you’re certain, Your Cuteness.”

 

“I  _ am _ quite cute, thank you for mentioning so,” Bowsette said with an all-too proud grin. “And yeah, I’m certain.”

 

“Okay… my Queen.” The word felt foreign on the wizard’s lips, but it fit the happy, cute woman who used to be his King. So Kamek swallowed up the slightly uncomfortable feeling that accompanied the title, closed his eyes, and cast his spell. A blue hexagon, red circle, and green square burst out of the glass ball that sat at the end of his rod, from whence his magic came, and the spell hit his Queen square in the chest. Bowsette’s eyes widened and she stumbled back a little, gasping. The crown fell off… but Bowsette remained.

 

“Awesome!” she crowed, jumping and cheering. “This feels great! Thanks, Kamek. Now think you could whip me up some clothes? I’m thinking… a black dress. And spiked collars around my neck and arms. Yeah! That would look badass.”

 

“Of course, my―” Kamek started to say, preparing a spell to conjure the aforementioned objects, but suddenly Bowsette’s eyes widened and a blush stole across her cheeks.

 

“Um… actually, though,” the female Koopa-girl stammered, glancing away from her loyal subject, “could you, um… conjure a dildo?”

 

Kamek’s brain short-circuited.

 

~o~

 

_ FirePrince:  _ **Guys, we have a problem.**

 

_ PrettyInPink:  _ **A “Larry turned dad’s pillow into a pile of shaving cream” problem or a “Dad had an idea” problem?**

 

_ LightBlueShell:  _ **One time! One time and you guys never stop reminding me about it!**

 

_ FirePrince:  _ **A “Dad had an idea” problem.**

 

_ PrettyInPink:  _ **Oh no.**

 

_ Hammerling:  _ **Oh** **_no_ ** **. Also… Larry, you’re an idiot.**

 

_ LightBlueShell:  _ **Oi!**

 

_ IggyPop:  _ **Whaaat did he do now.**

 

_ FirePrince:  _ **Well**

 

_ FirePrince:  _ **That’s kind of the problem**

 

_ FirePrince:  _ **He… is now a she**

 

_ BeethovanTheTurtle:  _ **What? ...Is Kamek involved in this? Oh, wait, did he wear that crown Toadette was talking about in Toad Town the other day?**

 

_ FirePrince:  _ **YES AND IT’S WEIRD BECAUSE HE’S TRYING TO BE A MOM NOW**

 

_ Baller49:  _ **...I think I just threw up in my mouth.**

 

_ PrettyInPink:  _ **...Oh god.**

 

_ PrettyInPink:  _ **…**

 

_ PrettyInPink:  _ **...Do you think she’d let me do her make-up?**

 

_ [several people are typing] _

 

~o~

 

Bowsette, sitting on her bed in a transformed version of her old bedroom, stared with a lewd grin at the pink dildo in her hand that her loyal wizard had very reluctantly created for her. It was long, at least ten inches, but not too thick. It was the first thing she’d be inserting in herself, other than her own fingers a few hours previously. It made her a little bit nervous, but mostly she just  _ really _ wanted to discover what it might feel like to have an actual big, meaty rod pounding the living daylights out of her.

 

Also, she didn’t want her hymen intact when she inevitably would fuck Mario.

 

Her room closely resembled a porn star’s now. It had stone walls, with softly glowing candles illuminating everything in a flickering orange glow. Her king-size bed was made from a dark, elegant wood frame, her bedsheets maroon and her pillow dark green. Three Koopa shell plushies of the green, red, and blue varieties sat in front of the other pillow on the other side of the bed.

 

A cabinet for all the various clothes she’d eventually have Kamek make for her―why spend pointless coins on things they could magic out of thin air?―sat intimate with the right wall. A bureau where her future underwear sat against the wall directly opposite to her bed; an ornate mirror lay on it. She could see herself in its reflection. Her face was red, and her eyes were wide with both excitement and fear. A door next to the corner on the right wall led to her bathroom and a door on the left led to a hallway. A desk sat beside this door, with a candle, pencil holder, folders, and several draws filled with paperwork she’d had to do in ages past.

 

Being king (queen, now) was tough work.

 

Bowsette’s scarlet eyes flicked back to the mirror and she gazed at her nude self. Her hand held the vibrator a few inches from her pussy, like it had been for the past several minutes.

 

She was about to put something this big inside herself.

 

Her snowy skin tingled. With what emotion, she wasn’t certain.

 

She swallowed and closed her red eyes. With a thrust of her hand, Bowsette plunged the long, hard shaft into her new sex. Pain shot through her as her hymen broke and blood seeped around the dildo. For several long moments, she sat quivering on her bed, tears streaming out of her eyes. She had expected pain but not like that. The redhead wondered if this was really right; if she should be doing this. She bit her lip to not cry out with the waves of pain that rolled over her.

 

At last, though, they subsided. Shivering, Bowsette decided to first take a trip to the bathroom to wash out the blood in her sex and on her dildo. Then she dried it all off and returned to her bed, leaning against her headrest and carefully lining up the shaft with her entrance, using her mirror for guidance. Her hand, trembling, pumped the dildo inside again, carefully this time. Her pink walls stretched over it and rubbed against its roundness. Bowsette swallowed in surprise; that felt nice. Not  _ really _ nice, but good nonetheless.

 

Taking a shuddering breath, the horned Queen of the Koopas brought the toy mostly out of her cunt, then pushed it in again, striking up a slow pace to get used to the feeling of being filled. Whereas before she’d felt a horrific agony, now sparks of warm desire crawled up her spine. Her body quivered and her buxom breasts bounced as she gasped in delight. She lifted her ass off the ground unconsciously.

 

“More, more!” she gasped, tongue lolling out of her mouth.

 

Her speed picked up. Bowsette pistoned the phallic toy in and out of herself with a much more rapid pace, and it increased the sensations to a far higher degree. She squealed, eyes hazy with lust. The redheaded beauty’s twat oozed with the juices of her sex. The dildo got utterly drenched in it, allowing it to slide through her fresh cunt more easily.

 

Her red eyes flicked down to her hypnotically bouncing breasts with a hungry gaze.

 

“My… nipple…” she moaned, licking her lips. “Wanna taste… my breasts…”

 

Whereas previously the lust-addled monster girl had contented herself with simply groping them, she now felt an irresistible desire to suckle on the tit-flesh. She certainly had large enough breasts to do so; they hung off her chest like wonderfully soft melons.

 

With this thought running through her mind, Bowsette licked her lips, enjoying the feeling of her tongue running over her pointy teeth, and brought up a breast to feed herself with. Her eyes widened again when she latched her lips around the pert nipple. An airy whine escaped her lips, high-pitched and sexy. It made her own face flush.  _ God _ , that was a sexy moan, and  _ god _ did that feel good.

 

She sucked on her own tit like a baby, mewling at the sensation of her hot lips on them. Her hand jack-hammered the dildo in her now, bringing her to undiscovered depths of pleasure. Her breath came in short, needy gasps even as she slurped on her nipple.

 

“MMMMFfff, fuck yes, fuck me, god!” she cried as her body was once again overwhelmed.

 

Oh, how much more delicious would it feel if that dildo were Mario’s―

 

Bowsette froze as she suddenly received a mental image of the plumber looming over her, the toy transformed into his dick. Her face heated up. Mixed feelings of both want and horror filled her as she finally realized the fullness of what she had decided. Perhaps it was because she was a girl now and had something actually phallic inside her, but she had finally gotten a good idea of what she might end up doing.

 

And she was quite suddenly  _ not prepared _ for it at all.

 

Oh shit, she thought, paling even as she reddened.  _ Oh shit. _

 

Her building orgasm quickly vanished and her dildo fell out of her as she chanted in her brain  _ oh shit oh shit oh shit _ .

 

She stared down at her own body, which was slick with sweat from fucking herself, with abject horror. For the first time, Bowsette realized how many new things she was going to have to learn. She realized how little she actually  _ knew _ about the female body. She realized she needed a teacher.

 

But who could possibly teach her, the former King Bowser, about this???

 

Bowsette’s red eyes lit up as an idea struck. She grinned a savage, pointy-toothed grin and raced out of her bedroom, not caring about how her pussy juice still covered her thighs or the fact that the guards saw her totally naked as she ran as fast as she could toward Kamek’s room.

 

“KAMEK!” she bellowed once she reached said room and punched the door open. Her skin may have become soft, but her fist remained as unrelenting as ever. “GET ME THOSE CLOTHES!”

 

Kamek, sitting at his desk and poring over some book or other, jumped and turned around at the dynamic entrance. “M-My liege?” he stammered, looking up and down her new body. “I thought you wanted to… uh… to, you know―”

 

“Fuck that!” Bowsette barked, blushing. She folded her arms underneath her breasts. “I’m going out!”

 

Kamek stared. “Where to, my Embarrassedness?”

 

“Where else?” She grinned. “Peach’s castle.”

 

Kamek mentally groaned. He was really getting too old for this.

 

~o~

 

“PEEEEEEEAAAAACH!” The all-too-familiar roar rumbled throughout the castle, making Toads yelp and run for cover. Peach, who had been walking en route to the store set up inside the castle on the first floor, blinked and tilted her head.

 

Was it just her, or did it sound different?

 

Warily, the pink-themed princess stared at the front door a short distance from her. What was it this time? She wondered if Bowser was going to try to kidnap her again. The thought flew out of her mind as soon as it had entered. If he was interested in doing that again, he’d simply bust through the door, or a wall, or a window or something. She’d known the Koopa King long enough to know his I’m-going-to-kidnap-you habits (unfortunately). No, he had to want something else. A better go-kart made for him, maybe? A new tennis racket? More golf clubs?

 

“HEY! DON’T MAKE ME BREAK THIS DAMN DOOR DOWN! YOU KNOW I WILL!”

 

Peach sighed wearily to herself. Couldn’t she just get  _ one _ peaceful day?

 

The mentally exhausted blonde groaned as she walked to the doors, prim and proper in her step even now. She hesitated at the grand doors, then pushed them open.

 

What she saw on the other side was  _ absolutely _ not what she expected to.

 

Her mind skipped a beat. “...What?” she managed to croak out.

 

A blush stole across the figure in front of her. “I need you to teach me how to be a girl.”

 

“...Bowser?” Peach said weakly, desperately hoping she wasn’t correct.

 

“I prefer Bowsette now,” the horned and shelled almost mirror image of her huffed. She tossed her red hair in annoyance, her black, goth dress flowing past her feet as she swept into the castle. “Show me to your quarters. Teach me what you know.”

 

...Peach had never been a drinking kind of girl, but  _ wow _ did she suddenly need one.


End file.
